“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearer.”
Ephesians 4:29
Let’s focus on Godly communication in marriage.
My mind went to my actual posture and speech toward him.
Is my communication corrupt or edifying?
“A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart brings forth evil. For out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.”
Luke 6:45
I’m sure that no Christian husband or wife wants to think that their heart or words could be evil.
Communication starts in the heart and thoughts. What are you thinking about when you think about your spouse?
You may not say anything verbally ill (more on that in a minute), but do you know that your body language communicates everything else?
Let’s talk about that body language for a moment, shall we?
I’ll be fair and examine myself in this also.
I will also admit that the list below will seem a little “pouty” in nature, but it’s what happens.
Do I:
- Shrug my shoulders when my husband asks, “What’s wrong?” By this point he knows there’s definitely something going on.
- Walk out of the room without saying anything after he says something that I don’t like?
- Tense up when he touches me in an effort to make amends?
All of those are a heart condition that shows in our body language, which communicates loudly, “leave.me.alone!”.
I’m not saying that how we feel in certain instances aren’t valid.
My question is, is this a habit that is becoming a sin?
“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my rock and my Redeemer.”
Psalm 19:14
Now for the verbal in communication.
I want to be kind, sweet, gentle, understanding, give my husband the benefit of the doubt, and open to receive the same from him.
Instead of pointing out possible, or probable negatives in our speech, I want to encourage with the Word of God to stay on guard with our mouths.
We need to develop a healthy habit of “biting our tongue” when communicating with our spouse.
I want my husband to know that I value him and our time together. I don’t want to walk through this union not knowing how to properly communicate with him.
If there is something in my heart that’s bitter toward him that is causing me to give him the “cold shoulder” or speaking unkind words to him, I want God to call me out on it, and call it quickly!
Let’s determine to abide with God’s love flowing through us.
Its a great idea to get His Word in our spirit to be able to draw from.
I“But no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison…praising and cursing comes out of the same mouth. My brothers, these things should not be this way.” James 3:8-10
I“And I say to you, that every careless word that men shall speak, they shall render account for it in the day of judgment.” Matthew 12:36-37
I“The wise in heart will be called discerning, and sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness.” Proverbs 16:21
I“She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” Proverbs 31:26
I“A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.” Proverbs 15:4
I“The tongue of the righteous is a choice silver. The heart of the wicked is worth little.” Proverbs 10:20
Communication between husband and wife WILL happen at some level; be it negative or positive.
I want to learn to let God help me purify my heart and mouth in communicating with my husband.
Let’s pray:
Lord, I thank You that You have given me the ability to control my actions and my heart, and to do it best with the washing and purifying of Your Holy word.
I know that I will slip at times. Help me to recognize when I need to step back, ask forgiveness, and set things right. I know that there will be times that my actions or reactions may seem justifiable, but let me be mindful to walk in righteousness even when I’ve been wronged.
I want to exude a sweet, loving spirit as I live with my spouse. I want to see him with Your eyes, as Your valued child.
Lord, I want to communicate well. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen
Living With Sword and Coffee,
Kela
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