I’ve been dealing with selfishness (before it starts).
Brian had been under pressure (not a bad, bad thing) with getting work orders done in a timely manner. With this, he’s been very focused on work and not much else.
I would start to feel really put out by this and thinking, “what about me? Don’t I matter to you? Why aren’t you paying attention to me???” wah wah wahhh!
There are a few things that I have to remind myself of during those selfish times: My husband cannot meet every need or want that I have. He’s human. Besides, it’s not his “job” to meet my every need….where would God fit into that?
My husband is doing the best he can to provide for our family so that I can stay home and educate our children.
I must not believe satan’s lies when he tries to tell me that my needs aren’t important to my husband. I know for a fact that I’m on his mind constantly….that’s why he calls me throughout the day or texts me randomly to tell me that he’s in love with me.
As one of my friends says about husbands; they show that they care, but not necessarily the way we as wives always think they should. We may not get the lengthy conversations or the endless hours of just lounging in each others arms, but he does make sure that there is milk and food in the house before it starts to snow. He makes sure that my gas tank is full. etc.
There does have to be balance and emotional connection but there are times that I have to be understanding of the situation and rely on God to be my all so that I can be my husband’s helpmate during that time.
I am a major influence on my husband. My attitude affects him. If I’m cold to him, because my perceived reality is that he doesn’t care about me, he could start to resent that he has to go to work everyday to provide for a woman that’s unappreciative.
The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands. Proverbs 14:1
When I’m warm and gentle with him, he drops everything that he can to keep me satisfied. I have to keep my emotions in check.
The heart of her husband safely trust her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. Proverbs 31:11-12
Brian and I have a saying; something that we try to remember to ask ourselves if we’re feeling ill toward each other: “My perception is my reality BUT is that the truth?”
It has diffused many a explosions. LOL (We don’t have explosions. We really do live peaceably with each other.)
After reading back over this post, it seems like I’ve visited this topic before. I guess this is a little reminder for myself!