I was arrogant in my thinking not too long ago that I had the most perfect marriage on the face on the earth. Well, almost perfect. Besides, we have steadily grown over the past 14 or so years. What could possibly set our marriage back? We have read countless books on how to improve our marriage, how to handle conflict and how to have a great sex life (TMI, I know, but we’re married).
In my quest to make my marriage better, I hit some stumbling blocks. I was almost knocked out, but God reminded me of the tools that He had already given me to defeat the enemy. The Holy Spirit brought to my remembrance (John 14:26) all that I had learned about what God’s Word says about my marriage, defeating the enemy, standing in faith and prayer. He also reminded me that the battles that I/We fight are not against flesh and blood but against principalities, powers, rulers of the darkness, spiritual hosts of wickedness (Ephesians 6:12). Satan was after my marriage to destroy it. He uses any vice that he thinks will take a stronghold and drive a wedge between us. My husband and I are a force that will fight to the death. We win!!
For the longest time, my husband and I were always on the “same page”. We shared the same dreams, hopes, passions and most times thoughts.
As more demands and pressures were put on us individually, it became evident in our lack of communication with each other. Attitudes and emotions ran high for a period of time. It was like walking on eggshells so that one’s feelings weren’t hurt.
After gaining mentorship myself, I began to see my husband in a brighter light. Even though in the past I honored and respected my husband, it was on a basis of easiness; when things were seemingly always smooth. My true commitment had never been stretched.
As I was struggling with selfishness in wondering, ‘Why can’t he see how I’m feeling?’ and ‘Don’t I mean more to him than he’s showing right now?’, God began to show me through my mentor that I am to be my husband’s greatest cheerleader at all times, to remember that he is human, he can’t meet my every need (he’s not God) and that when my husband seems to be at his weakest, that’s the time to intercede for him in prayer. THAT is what got me back on track to love my husband with a new love and passion.
I’m happy to say that we have come through that struggle with new zeal and commitment to our covenant together.
I say all of that to say that we will now have the opportunity to share with other couples in our church through a marriage class that will be offered in the Fall.
I got a call from one of our pastors yesterday asking if Brian and I would be interested in facilitating and mentoring a few couples. We are honored and excited to share our story and struggles, but most importantly, our victories.