Anyone that reads my marriage post knows that I’m a fighter when it comes to the sanctity and covenant of marriage. I’ve had to fight, mostly on my knees, for some things in my own marriage. There have been a LOT of things that I’ve had to correct in myself concerning my marriage.
The matter of porn, I’ve never written about. I leave that up to others to address because they do it so well!
I’m jumping in to tell you about Pure Eyes, Clean Heart for 2 reasons, *Jen is a dear friend of mine and *it’s a subject that is not so much of a secret anymore.
I can imagine that this is already a hard subject to write about, but writing it with my spouse would seem like a challenge.
Craig and Jen Ferguson have opened up the depths of their personal lives as a ministry to help others struggling with porn addiction.
Pure Eyes, Clean Heart : A Couple’s Journey to Freedom from Pornography
Porn is an evil destroyer.
It wears the face of many avenues, suggestions, strongholds and lies.
Its one of those things that manifests in making John 10:10 ring most true:
The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy.
When I started reading Pure Eyes, Clean Heart, I saw it as a glorious overcoming of such a vile and strong addiction.
I also saw how it can aid in overcoming anything that I’ve held too close and idolized; which is sin.
Mindsets and heart attitudes were closely examined.
But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is fully grown, brings forth death. Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren. –James 1:14-16 (NKJV)
I wanted to leave the title of my post open-ended because addictions come in all forms and we should fiercely deal with each one according to the Holy Scripture.
At the same time, I don’t want to diminish the purpose of this post or the book that I’m reviewing.
The stats are staggering when it comes to Christians being lured into the darkness of porn.
Some see it as strictly entertainment, some as escape, some for arousal, or getting a “need met”.
None of those reasons are good enough to partake in porn.
That goes quadruple for the married man/woman! At that point, its adultery and its not okay!
But oh, my brother and sister, THERE IS HOPE and a way to break the chains!
I can’t claim to know a whole lot about overcoming this addiction, but I strongly encourage you to dive into Craig and Jen’s writing and more so, into the Holy Word of God.
Craig and Jen share in this YouTube video how there is always a choice, and that it doesn’t have to be a lonely process.
For a long time, I took the secret of Craig’s porn addiction and I stuffed in my heart. I didn’t even really share it with God much because I couldn’t bear to believe this was part of my marriage.
In truth, I wanted to fix it and forget it. Rather, I wanted my husband to fix it and forget it. But could I trust him to deal and wrestle and seek Jesus for this affliction? Honestly, I didn’t. I didn’t trust my husband, so I made it my mission to fix the problem for him.
This is the only way I’d though we’d be able to move on in our marriage. I couldn’t let the darkness of porn keep invading. It took too much of a toll on me, on him, on our relationships with God. Sure, he was the one sinning against me, but guess what? The whole cycle stirred up cycles of sin in me, too.
About Jen Ferguson:Jen Ferguson is passionate about Jesus, her husband, and her two girls. She is the facilitator of The Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood and loves to encourage women to bring their true selves out into the light. She is the co-author of Pure Eyes, Clean Heart: A Couple’s Journey to Freedom from Pornography. You can find out more about the book by visiting their new site, www.PureEyesCleanHeart.com.
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